Problem
You can see it so clearly. In a dark alley behind a boite de nuit, a young couple is having sex on a shopping cart. Their eyes are bloodshot and their brains fried. They are in the throes of narcomania. On the top floor of an office building, a young exec takes a drag from a short spliff and his eyes roll to the back of his skull. He too is a narcomaniac. Someone needs to take a stand. The world needs a Narc. The world needs you. (Don't worry, you can still drink and smoke, those aren't real drugs.)
While researching
Once internalized
- No positive effects from drugs
- No negative effects from alcohol
Solution
Halt! Put down the pipe, scumbag! The Narc is on the scene and he's gonna tell it to you straight. Drugs are for losers. They fry your brain and rewire your circuits to self-destruct. And they make you masturbate too. Have a drink instead. Have two. Have three bottles of wine, it's impossible to masturbate after three bottles of wine. And remember, friends don't let friends get high...or be sober. Peace out, little brother.
