Conversation · Andre

"Ether? I don't smell ether. Do you, Noid?"

"Nope."

"All right. Enough of this." (Conclude.)

He nods enthusiastically. No doubt a little relieved.

"What's with all the Nosaphed?"

"The what now?" He leans in to hear you better.

"The whatever, I wanted to know about another thing."

(Point at the bottles of nasal spray in the corner.) "The 'Nosaphed Ultra.' You have a lot of it lying around."

"Oh! The old 'Ultra'... we.... uhm..."

He's like an actor looking to the souffleur for his line.

"I have a major sinus infection. Stuffy nose. We all do. Shit's all blasted up. Winter. Can't even breathe."

"You sound fine to me."

"Yes!" He nods energetically. "That's all Nosaphed's doing. Without the Nosa I'd be drowning in shit right now."

"Nosaphed is the shit!"

"Can I have some? I have some nose problems too."

"Uhm... sure." He picks one up from the corner and hands it to you. "Here you go, officer -- the Nosa! Blast away!"

"Good. Now unto the next thing."

"Oh, okay, I guess that makes sense. Tell me about another thing."

"I see you brought your own water."

"Yeah, yeah! Good to have, bitch to carry. When I first scouted the place I did some reconnaissance. I'm not sure the church even has running water."

"About another thing..."

"And it's distilled too."

"Oh?" He doesn't know what to say.

"It's the one they sell at the fuel station."

It's like he's lying to you, my liege. But he's slippery enough that there's nothing for you to grab hold of.

"Mhm?"