Conversation · The Hanged Man

"You have a point there."

"Sadly, yes. The whole RCM is out there right now, doing the exact same thing we are. Are we in a rush to help them? Not with this on our hands..." He covers his nose.

"We could saw the branch."

"Climb up there and... saw the branch?"

It seems unclimbable, cause the ladder is treacherously rotten, but you could use your hands and feet to reach around the tree, then hang from the branch...

"I could do it. It's well within my repertoire."

"Honestly, I prefer a non-acrobatic solution to this." He looks around -- then at you.

"Yeah... it seems dangerous."

"There has to be a less risky way. With less falling down off trees."

"Why?"

"Clown Cops Climb Tree, Fall Down," he says, furrowing his brow. "Enraged Cop Assaults Children -- After Falling From Tree."

"Cretin Cop... -- they like that word -- ...Saws The Branch He's Sitting On (Literally). Local Children Report Corpse Mutilation."

"Fuck, yeah! Climb that shit, monkeys!"

"C, you're only making them do those things less."

"Can you see into the future, Kim?"

"No, I do not see the future. I made those up using two decades in the Revacholian police force as a reference point."

"So we're going to just let those kids bully us into not doing our work?"

"What I'm proposing is -- we save acrobatic tricks as a last resort. After we've tried everything else."

"These have got to be the most fucking boring mulkkupäät I've ever seen."

"I'm not afraid of newspapers. We shouldn't be."

"Oh, no." He shakes his head slowly. "We should be very afraid of newspapers. And the radio stations too. We should be wary of enticing them in any way."

This is years of experience talking. He's seen career after career ruined by careless media strategies.

"You're right. The risks are too high and there are too many."

"Yes. We should use acrobatics as the very last option. After we've tried everything normal."

"Yes. Either one of us could do it. We could use the kids' ladder on the side of the tree."

"No," he says, shaking his head, "that ladder is not climbable and I don't really see another good way up there."

"I don't trust that ladder. The assailants didn't use it. It's rotten and less sturdy than it looks. And I don't see another good way up there."

Even Cuno thinks it's unclimbable, cause the ladder is treacherously rotten, but you could use your hands and feet to reach around the tree, then hang from the branch...

It seems doable. The kids' ladder is treacherously rotten, but you could use your hands and feet to reach around the tree, then hang from the branch...

"We could bring your motor carriage over -- cut the belt from the roof?"

"I have thought of that, yes. But the tyre tracks would compromise the scene. Any prints would become illegible. That's if we get it through the hole in the fence..."

"Also, my MC has a sloped roof, it's a sports model." He makes a gesture indicating a harsh degree of sloping. "The roof is slippery -- an all-around bad platform to stand on."

He could come up with at least four more reasons why not to trample on the roof of his sports model motor carriage.

"How about I take you piggyback?"

"How about I take you piggyback?" After a moment’s silence, he raises an eyebrow.

"The fuck are these pigs talking about?"

"Their bank or something. It's fucking boring, Cuno. Wish they'd fuck already."

"Lieutenant, are you sure you could carry my weight though?"

"I wasn't actually implying I would. I meant it's a bad idea."

"It's a fucking hilarious idea -- you two paskapää's get on top each other and fuck!"

In silence, the lieutenant gives you a meaningful glance. As if to say: case in point.

"Fucking SHUT UP!"

"Pig, why you gotta disrespect my girl? This shit makes Cuno sad."

"Fuck that banaanipoika in the ass Cuno!"

"Lieutenant, you meant it rhetorically, right? You're criticizing my idea?"

"Yes. It's not a good idea."

"Would you please shut up."

"Would you please SUCK MY DICK?" The one behind the fence makes a gesture, as if taking out their penis.

"Fucking mulkku..."

(Give up.) "Okay, how about..."

The lieutenant inspects the belt, his forehead lined with worry.

"Could your attachment to your sports model motor carriage be clouding your judgement?"

"Yes," he concedes. "I am attached to it. But it's also unsuitable. We can't bring a supercharged tractor through that tiny gap in the fence, then plough the scene with it. Then fall off the roof. It would sound bad on Channel 8."

"It'd sound fucking hilarious, do it! Fucking get on top of it and dance, fägäri!"

"Maybe we can ask for help from the harbour?"

"I was really hoping we wouldn't -- the Union appear to be suspects in this case. It seems like a dangerous route to go down."

Confirmed. It's unsafe.

I would really prefer if there was another way. These people might have an agenda.

"But what else can we do?" (Commit to it.)

"Okay..." He looks at the cargo belt. "They do have the tools and the men. And since it looks like they put him there..."