Conversation · Measurehead

"This explains everything."

"SERVITUDE TO AL GUL DOES NOT EXPLAIN EVERYTHING. THERE ARE OTHER REASONS FOR YOUR RACE DESCENT."

"You're right. I'm a servant of Al Gul, but I still need to enter the harbour."

"NO, YOU DON'T, YOU NEED TO GET ANOTHER DRINK; OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP B4 IS DONE GIVING ORDERS AROUND HERE. THE INFLUENCE OF THE HAM SANDWICH RACE IS WANING."

Show him the ham still got it!

Does this remind you of someone? The guy down there...

"Actually, I think the ham sandwich race still has it in them."

"WILLINGLY CALLING YOURSELF A HAM SANDWICH. HOW FAR THE OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP HAS FALLEN..." He pauses in melancholy reflection. "YOU WERE ONCE A NOBLE AND POWERFUL RACE."

"YOU GAVE THE WORLD EUGENICS, ELECTRICITY, AND POWERFUL WEAPONS OF WAR LIKE MISSILES AND AEROSTATIC AIRCRAFT. YOU MADE GREAT GAINS IN METALLURGY, RACE THEORY, AND STATECRAFT."

"YOU DOMINATED LESSER CULTURES -- LIKE THE DEFORMED HIMEANS AND THE INEXPLICABLY POTATO-OBSESSED KOJKOS -- BUT NOW YOUR ASCENT TO THE GENETIC SUMMIT HAS HALTED. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH SADNESS AND WITH FRIVOLOUS POP CULTURE."

"YOU WILL BE SUPERSEDED -- ISN'T THAT RIGHT, BABE?"

"It is, baby, yeah. You know it!"

There is a button right behind him, just out of reach... it must be the one that opens the door to the harbour.

This man is not budging. Let's hope his superiors inside are more cooperative.

"That fat racist over there... (Point to the racist lorryman.) You're just him after pumping some iron."

"LOOK AT MY CRANIOLOGY. I AM THE PINNACLE OF MY HAPLOGROUP. THE PINK BLOB IS A BAD EXAMPLE EVEN OF YOURS. IT SADDENS ME..." He pauses in melancholy reflection. "YOU WERE ONCE A NOBLE AND POWERFUL RACE."

"The race stuff is unimportant here -- I just need you to help me do my job, please."

"BEGGING FOR HELP. ATTEMPTING TO PASS FEAR FOR COOPERATION. HOW FAR THE OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP HAS FALLEN..." He pauses in melancholy reflection. "YOU WERE ONCE A NOBLE AND POWERFUL RACE."

"I am the police and I need you to comply -- now!" (Take a step closer.)

"JERKING MOTIONS. SIGNS OF A LATE-STAGE NEURODEGENERATIVE DISORDER. HOW FAR THE OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP HAS FALLEN..." He pauses in melancholy reflection. "YOU WERE ONCE A NOBLE AND POWERFUL RACE."

"First, let me make this clear: I'm not a drunk. I'm a cop. I just have a drink every now and then, everyone does."

"THE ETHANOL FUNGUS IS DEEP WITHIN YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM, PULLING THE STRINGS. YOU ARE MERELY ITS PUPA NOW. I SEE NO HOPE FOR YOU OR YOUR KIND."

(Smell your breath.) "Kim, is it really so bad?"

"It's not good."

It's like a rat crawled into your stomach, got drunk and drowned.

"You're right, I'm an alcoholic. Now, I need to enter the harbour."

"Enough. I need you to open the door to the harbour."

"I don't have a problem with Al Gul. I just drink a little on the weekends."

"YOUR MOUTH MOVES, BUT THE ONE WHO SPEAKS IS AL GUL. YOU ARE BUT A VESSEL FOR THE GHOUL NOW. VERY LITTLE OF YOUR SELF REMAINS."

"OCCIDENTAL HAPLOGROUP B4 IS DONE GIVING ORDERS AROUND HERE. THE INFLUENCE OF THE HAM SANDWICH RACE IS WANING."

"What do you mean, my body betrays my degeneracy?"

"My body is unimportant. I'm with the police and we need to get into the harbour."

"THAT IS PRECISELY THE NEGLIGENCE THAT HAS LED YOU TO SUCCUMB TO AL GUL." His face contorts in disgust, as if he were smelling a dead rat.

Fight.

Say nothing, size him up first.

"ARE YOU ADMIRING MY MORPHOPHYSIOLOGY?" A ripple of muscle passes underneath his skin. He lets you look.

"IT MUST BE FRIGHTENING TO STAND IN THE SHADOW OF THIS RACIAL PINNACLE. BE CALM, HAM SANDWICH. YOU ARE NOT IN DANGER, BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT A THREAT TO ME."

Puff out your chest, still say nothing.

"WHAT IS THIS ANDROGYNOUS DISPLAY OF SEXUAL MATURITY?" He looks down at you, taking stock of your physique.

Things are not as bad as they look. Sure, you have high blood pressure from metabolizing heroic quantities of ethanol. But you are robustly built. You will survive.

"I CAN SEE YOU WERE ONCE AN ATHLETE. THEN DETERIORATED IN YOUR TWENTIES. IT IS TYPICAL OF YOUR HAPLOGROUP. LET'S BLAME THE FAILED EDUCATION SYSTEM AND LENIENCY TOWARD DEGENERATES IN YOUR HOMELAND."

"Jean-Luc, his body is betraying his degeneracy pretty hard..." She holds her nose. "Maybe you can ask him to leave?"

You hear your heart pumping, fast and irregular. Your joints ache and you feel old... but still alive, somehow.

"STOP IT. YOU ARE EMBARRASSING YOURSELF IN FRONT OF THIS WOMAN, AND YOUR PAEDOMORPHIC FRIEND."

"Khm..."

"THIS DISPLAY OF WEAKNESS MAY APPEAL TO OLDER WOMEN, WITH A STRONGER MATERNAL INSTINCT -- BUT IT IS A LIABILITY, HERE ON BATTLEFIELD MARTINAISE."

"STOP IT. YOU ARE EMBARRASSING YOURSELF IN FRONT OF THIS WOMAN."

Merely standing up makes you sweat profusely. Your breathing is erratic. Your own heartbeat in your ears grows frantic and you feel your blood pressure rise.

"We don't have time to get into this now." [Leave.]

"My body is unimportant."

"YOUR BODY BETRAYS YOUR DEGENERACY."

"Yeah, Measurehead, his body totally betrays his degeneracy," the young woman at the giant's side agrees.