Conversation · Dolores Dei

"Lists are absolutely normal. Everyone has them. You just list everything you want to ask."

In descending order, usually... It's best to do them like that.

"No" (Lie.)

"Let's talk about something else."

"See? Let's talk about something else..." She sighs.

"They're not lists. They're trees."

"This is another one, isn't it? We're in a tree right now!"

"Nothing."

"In case you haven't noticed, I'm a cop. It's not easy work."

"A cop... You've worked there for so long you can't even talk like a normal person anymore! It's always lists with you. Questions."

(Nod.) "Yes. I may know what you mean."

"No, you don't. You've worked there for so long you can't even talk like a normal person anymore! It's always lists with you. Questions."

"It was just a necktie. It's over anyway."

"Everyone gets a little down."

"A little down? You've worked there for so long you can't even talk like a normal person anymore! It's always lists with you. Questions."

"You're not even human."

She shakes her head. "I am actually very ordinary, Harry. Below this gown and wreath I have an ordinary soul and ordinary thoughts. The only thing inhuman about me is this..." She looks around.

"This thing you've made me into. I'm sorry for saying so, but I just hate it. What is this? This is so far gone, Harry, I don't even..."

"No, you're special. You had glowing lungs."

"My lungs do not glow, Harry. I am just like all the others. None of us have glowing lungs -- stop making me into some kind of..."

Then it's you. You will make her lungs glow. Your pain is NOT meaningless.

She will -- once you have erected the TEMPLE OF LIGHT.

The phasmid queen! Quick!

"I forgive you that you're pregnant. I can deal with it. Just..."

"Oh, Harry... I don't need you to forgive. It's a good thing for me." She smiles. "It's good news, why aren't you smiling more?"

A warm gust wraps her gown around her waist and between her thighs.

An apricot scented ghost wafts out of her -- her skin, the fabric -- into the flow of the air around you.

All the roads will miss her footsteps when she's gone from here.

A completely different world.

"I want to go back to the completely different world. The see-through world with you."

"Please, Harry..." The gown moves on her limbs, like water. "I don't understand what you're saying. You're pitiful and frightening, a smoky apparition of its former self."

"I miss you so much."

"It will pass..." The gown moves on her limbs, like water. "Everything does."

Say nothing.

The gown moves on her limbs, like water. She breathes out, her breath heavy. You're running out of ideas.

"I can still make your lungs glow, I know I can. If you only let me."

No answer. The arches of her brows quiver as she looks you in the eye and backs away from you...

You won't do any of that. You can barely make her cry.

"I have discovered a new species -- I will name it in your honour. The Dolorian Phasmid. It's beautiful like you and also has a white head."

"That sounds like it would be in the news... I don't want that, okay?" There's a pause. "Please don't name it that. You discovering a new species changes nothing. If someone else discovered a new species and named it after me, then I would be flattered. But not you."

"Then I will make you different. I will make your lungs glow. I will make you last forever."

"Oh, Harry... There is only one way for humans to last forever -- and you did not do that to me..." She shakes her head.

"I will build you a temple of light with my mind. A temple of unimaginable proportions. It will be something no one has ever done before. I will build it with computers."

"An immortal temple of light? That sounds nice. I do want someone to do that for me -- who wouldn't? -- but not you. I don't want anything from you."

"You're right. You don't have glowing lungs. You don't deserve them."

"I didn't ask for them either. They're just a folk tale that has nothing to do with my reign, or the direction I have set our species on..." She glances over her shoulder, then back at you.

You couldn't make her lungs glow anyway, only cry. And maybe not even that anymore.

"But then this is all meaningless."

"It is -- and it's making me late for my beautiful-beautiful flight to Mirova. Far, far away from you -- and Revachol."

"Okay, I'm not gonna push it. I have other questions."

"Other questions are the last thing I need right now..." She cups her ear. "Hush, can you hear? I think that's the 42..."

It's not. It's not that yet. It's another, you have plenty of time to win her over with questions and kisses...

"I've taken responsibility for my actions now. I'm a new man. Weighty and normal."

She doesn't know what to say.

"I'm so fucking normal right now."

"Yes. Okay. I'm glad."

"You're right. I'm not normal. I'm shit."

"Do you know how much it hurts me to hear you say that?" She sounds downright angry. "I'm shit, you made me shit... I can't do this any more. I can't make you insane and shit any more, I can't let you turn me into a bad person. I have to go..."

Total annihilation. We got annihilated, Harry. You never had any power, you never were a moralist -- or anything. You can't even be insane or shit any more. You have to be nothing. Nothing without the light and grace of love.

"I mean: I'm a moralist. The other moralists almost took me away on their airship! I'm not a broken, insane man who can't live without you. I know I made mistakes. And I've taken full responsibility for all of them. So you can live with me again if you want to. I'm better now."