Conversation · Cindy the SKULL

"Have you got any kids? Because you sound like the world's saddest dad right now."

"But, fine, take the brush. I'm all out of fuel oil anyway." She drops the paintbrush at your feet.

"I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you again: Give me the brush, please."

(Attempt to establish contact.) "Hey, sister. Let's talk politics for a minute."

"And what do you know about politics?" She squints at you suspiciously.

"My nose told me that you're also a communist. We should team up, join forces."

"Well, well. Sounds like quite the snout you've got there..."

Your olfactory department wants you to know that it accepts no responsibility for wherever this line of interrogation leads you.

"Sure. I know someone who'd love to talk that ideological stuff. You're looking for Steban."

"Who's Steban?"

"A right communist. Who runs a mega cool and very secret meeting."

"Does this 'Steban' happen to go around in a white jacket?"

"He might."

"Will you help me find him?"

She pretends to think about it for a moment. "No."

The lieutenant lets slip a sigh that seems to suggest this turn was utterly predictable.

"I guess I should just give up, then. Nothing ever works out for me."

"God, if he isn't the saddest pig in the world..."

Incidentally, 'The Saddest Pig in the World' is the title of a popular Gottwaldian children's book, written and illustrated by Moritz Metzger. In '26 it received the prestigious Kritikerpreis for youth literature.

"Oh, fine, I'll help. But first, I want something from you..."

She's got you by the balls, chief. And she intends to squeeze them.

"What's that?"

A wicked grin extends across her face.

A laughing skull. Death hilarious. This is gonna be baaaad...

"Oink for me, piggy. Just once."

"Come on, this is no way to treat your revolutionary brother!"

"Wrong. This is exactly how I treat my little brother."

(With gusto.) "Oink, oink!"

"Wow. That was easier than I expected. It's almost like you've been wanting to do it this whole time..."

A cool, damp feeling ripples through you. You realise you needn't have rolled over quite so easily.

The lieutenant, needless to say, is not impressed.

"Sounds like you're really serious about meeting Steban. It's touching, sort of."

"Steban's group meets only at night, in an old room in these apartments here. It just so happens you're in luck: Their weekly meeting is tonight."

"Poke your snout around sometime after 22.00 and you might just find them."

"Wait, how am I supposed to get into the apartments if I don't live there?"

"Use your little piggy brain. I'm sure someone will let you in..."

But it won't be this one.

"Just not me."

"Hmm, why do I feel like there's a catch..."

"Oh, smart pig, because there is..."

"See, Steban's a bit on the paranoid side. He's got all these mega secret passphrases, to keep out infiltrators and the like. You can't join the meeting without one."

"Ahem..." The lieutenant clears his throat.

"Not to interfere in your personal errand, but I wonder whether it might have something to do with that phrase Mañana mentioned overhearing."

"Oh, right. Good thinking, Kim."

The lieutenant nods.

"Guess this is what happens when two pigs put their heads together..." She seems slightly disappointed.

"That's enough. Off with you then." She makes a lazy shooing motion with her dangling hand.

"That's really dumb. You should feel embarrassed even suggesting that."

"You're right. How foolish of me. Won't happen again, detective."

"Intra-piggy conflict. Very cool..." For a moment her eyes appear to light up.

"You should listen to your partner every once in a while. He's not so dim as you are."

"I was totally about to say that."

"Of course you were, detective. Apologies for interrupting." The lieutenant smiles to himself.

No, you weren't. Otherwise you would have said it. In truth, it was quite beyond your associative powers.

"Wait, what phrase?"

The lieutenant consults his notebook. "'Remember Dobreva and Abadanaiz'."

Hang on, could it have something to do with that strange inside-talk the boiadeiro mentioned?

"But you're not going to tell me, are you?"

"Why would I? That would be so boring."

That's fine. You don't need her to tell you, because you already know it.