Conversation · Idiot Doom Spiral

"The re-conceptualization? I've been busy with other things."

"Other things? We're talking about your big moment here, your time to shine, your ascension into a household name."

He's struggling to cover up his nerves now that he's having one less beer a day.

"Well, no rush, but it'd be good to know what you make of it when you get a chance."

He's covering up any nerves with the tried and true method -- excessive drinking.

"The re-conceptualization? Yeah, I've seen it."

"Great!" He scans your face for any telltale signs of a verdict. "Great."

"Seen what?"

"The re-conceptualization of the monument? Your new reality situation?" His words are stale with alcohol and utter disbelief.

"The re-conceptualization? I had a quick look but I haven't really taken it in properly."

"Oh, I see what you're doing. Keeping us waiting for the verdict, drawing it out -- I like it. Really builds up the suspense." He looks to his drinking partner. "Forever the showman, this one."

"Man, you're like, bleeding now. Reality's really messed you up."

"Tequila Sunset." He nods in appreciation.

"Hey, Tequila! Welcome to reality. How's it treating you?" A thirty-something Lickra(TM)-clad man takes a sip from his beer.

"Reality? It makes me aggressively sad."

"I know what you mean. Sitting around with these bums you really get to know the nitty-gritty of reality. And it isn't good." He looks at his buddies with mock appreciation.

"Things aren't going super well for Idiot Doom Spiral either. Haven't found those keys yet; haven't won that great piece of ass back. No word from my business-buddies..." He takes a sip from his beer.

This guy's your buddy-buddy. You feel it immediately: you belong to an organization. A fraternity. Of drunks.

Idiot Doom Spiral, huh? This is bound to be a good, high-concept conversation. At last!

Business buddies, huh? This guy might be just what we're looking for. Ask him if he knows any Personal Brand Strategists who can help you out.

"Sadly, things aren't going that well in Idiot Doom Spiral Land. Haven't found those keys yet; haven't won that great piece of ass back. No word from my business-buddies..." He takes a sip from his beer.

"Well, nice meeting you but I've got to go." [Leave.]

"Reality? It's perishing. Soon only glowing embers will remain of the atoms; of human faces, only echoes."

"Not this again. I was hoping that we were done with it."

"Only echoes remaining of human faces? That's a pretty good apocalypse. I wouldn't mind if it came down to that." He nods appreciatively and picks at his shit-stained Lickra(TM) jacket.

"Don't know. People tell me I'm a cop, I'm getting used to that."

"It's good to hear that you're on top of things. Talking about used to -- did you know that I used to be a real mover and shaker?" He thoughtfully picks at his shit-stained Lickra(TM) jacket.

"Nothing special. Like everyone else. I have all sorts of wild thoughts running through my head, but then pick the most boring one."

"I have re-entered reality to conquer it. To bend it to my will. I am the law."

"That's the spirit! I used to shape reality into my image. A long time ago. Those days are over now." He looks at his shit-stained Lickra(TM) jacket with a grim expression.

"Wait, Tequila?"

"Yeah, Tequila Sunset!" He takes a sip, "How are the, uhm, high-concept, reality-based adventures proceeding?"

He says it like it's obviously your name. Like you call someone Billy Brunuel or 'Leader of the Fourth Street Gang'.

Good, these people know your true name. Looks like it has preceded you, Mr. Sunset. More on that later.

I like this guy. You should, too. He respects you by calling you your true name.

"Not too hot. I'm on a 50-year losing streak."

"That's harsh. I'm like three or maybe four years into mine. Wait no, make it five." He looks at his shit-stained Lickra(TM) with a grim expression.

"Hey, Tequila!" A thirty-something man clad in a two-piece Lickra(TM) tracksuit puts down his pilsner and extends his hand in greeting.

"Good to see you! How's business? How's the whole reality situation treating you?"

Don't shake his hand.

"So what's happening?" He picks up his beer.

Shake his hand.