Boring Cop

"It's just police-work."

"Good day, ma'am. Everything alright?"

The grey and common bang-bang, that's me.

"Just answer some questions okay?"

Definitely a coincidence.

"Cool. I don't even have any interesting replies."

No, none of this Tequila Sunset business. It's gotten me to death's door. There has to be more in this world...

Let it fall to the ground, then pick it up. Like a normal adult person.

"Eight-five percent is not good enough when you're dealing with another person's physical well-being."

"Yeah, okay. Real like paying your bills or eating malt fibre in the morning."

"Nothing special. Like everyone else. I have all sorts of wild thoughts running through my head, but then pick the most boring one."

"For your information, alcoholism is a terrible, debilitating ailment."

"Back to police-mode." (Smile and nod.) "I have some questions, Gaston."

"Okay! Everybody calm down."

(Shake it.) "No need to thank me, just doing my job."

"A police detective."

"Boom -- I got you. Me, the most boring cop on Earth."

"I don't know anything about fate. I just wanted to talk about a medical issue."